My parents gave me four younger siblings: Oscar Serafin (Junjun), Maria Antonia (Tonette), Maria Luisa (May) and Oscar Michael (Kel). Our youngest, Kel, was born with Down’s Syndrome; he’s always been special to us particularly to Junjun.
I remember very clearly that mama was already expecting our youngest sibling to be a special child while she was conceiving him. She was suffering from terrible migranes and was under medications when she learned that she was already months pregnant.
I was still young and could remember her discussing this to her parents who are both doctors. After enough deliberation over her situation she opted to go on with her pregnancy than abort the fetus. I remember how she prepared all of us in welcoming this special baby into this world, letting us watch films involving disabilities in the betamax like "And Then Came John" and Sesame Street shows including kids with special cases as their guests. She was taking everything head-on.
But nothing and nobody really prepared us enough for the day that my brother was born. I wasn't there to see how he was brought into this world. Was he welcomed with a big bang? I was far away to know, in Naga City, busy academically competing during my first year in HS. But I heard from my relatives that mama was crying day and night for reasons I didn't want to know. Was she sorry for my baby brother?...sorry for herself?...sorry for the whole family?...only herself knew the answer.
I still remember when she was still pregnant and me and my siblings were in the car waiting for her. She was talking to a friend and we overheard her friend say: "You're lucky you have beautiful kids. And this baby inside you is going to be another beautiful kid for sure"...
Was she right? Indeed! Because I have never seen a person so beautiful inside than those with Down's Syndrome. They will forever be meek and mild, modest and shy, humorous and sweet, full of love and kindness in their hearts. They are afraid to hurt people physically and emotionally.
Pitying my brother with Down's Syndrome? I don't anymore. For I discovered how unique he is, and he has become an invaluable part of our lives. His honesty, his joy have touched us. He will forever be blessed with childlike innocence..." though the world may see the special child as the least significant, to God, he has the first place in heaven".
This article that I found in the news says that most societies are still being inhumane in their treatment to special children. When are we going to realize that special children do not deserve to be singled out for their disabilities? Is it really hard to accept them for their contributions just like everyone else?
UNICEF: Former Eastern Bloc countries still segregate disabled children
Even though attitudes toward disabled youth are improving, many Eastern Europe and Central Asia countries are still continuing the Soviet practice of placing special-needs children in institutions apart from mainstream society, according to a UNICEF report released yesterday. Marta Santos Pais, director of the research center that conducted the study, says outdated medical approaches and a lack of alternatives for dealing with the disabled could explain the countries' high rates of child abandonment. San Diego Union-Tribune/Associated Press
10 comments:
hi! i'm an engineer, i'm working in a manufacturing comp. here in the phils., i want to be a sped teacher and teach abroad. does it sounds crazy? an electrical engineer to be a sped teacher?
hi just droping by and look see after visited Ivan's blog...
You really have a great blog and no wonder you got allll the awards :>
keep it up.
I can only empathize with families that has a disabled child among them. Your brother is very lucky he was born to a very loving and understanding family.
That’s very sweet to know…am sure your younger brother is so proud of you…
This post reminded me of what my father and my mother say everytime we met or saw a special child.
"That kid will bring them fortune, because they are special angels from God."
At that time, hindi ko maintindihan, kasi nga malupit ang iba sa society natin. Malimit, ang tawag sa kanila abnoy.
But then, I realized the wisdom. Ang itinuturo pala sa amin ay ang tamang paraan kung papaano magmahal sa kapwa, kahit ano pa sya.
Based on what you say here, my parents are correct."though the world may see the special child as the least significant, to God, he has the first place in heaven".
Discrimination is indeed tragic when you consider that many of these folks desire to live a normal life. There was this case in Toronto of of a man and woman , both with Down Syndrome wanting to marry and live as husband and wife. The judge had to verify if they can be self-sufficient as a couple. Both had jobs and able to rent an apartment and support themselves so the judge granted their wish to the delight of many who were pulling for them.
Often, special children often receives special attention and somehow, this becomes an entirely new and unique challenge to their parents and siblings. There are altogether unique sets of coping and adjustments and in all, this becomes an entirely new learning experience; especially in human pyschology and relations.
Like myepinoy, when I was small we use to say that these special kids would bring luck in their families. Somehow, I have observed (since I had a neighbor before that had down syndrome) na parang totoo nga. Hindi lang swerte kundi nagpapasaya pa sa kanilang pamilya...They must have been angles in disguise.
The best things you can give to a child like that are 1) acceptance, 2)love, 3) and patience.
Indifference will make it harder for everyone...
How lucky he is to have a wonderful family. What a great tribute to your brother.
Your mom must be a really great person. You are lucky to have someone so courageous and loving as your rolemodel.
OT: I thought your entry was about that Pinoy couple who got jailed because they left their two kids home alone. It was probably the word "abandonment" in the title that led my false impression :D
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