Thursday, March 29, 2007


Give me the guidance to know
When to hold on
And when to let go
And the grace
To make the right decision
With dignity.


We were so in love that we simply couldn’t stand being apart any longer. But his Mom didn’t give a damn about our wishes. As far as we were concerned, none of us were breaking the law anymore because we were both over eighteen (23 to be exact). But his “Mom’s Law” was another law.

During the planning stage we only talked about our runaway when we were together. It was easier to communicate with him personally; it greatly reduced the possibility that someone would be listening in. Also, during those days, a landline or a celphone was never around in my boardinghouse. We never dared to let any more people in on the situation than was absolutely necessary. I vaguely remember if Randall knew about our planned escape.

Eventually, our friends learned that I was pregnant and were asking what were we planning to do. Since lying was a dangerous game to play, whenever possible we never answered people's questions. We did all the precautions that we could think of because Reiner’s Mom might just do some clever investigation. She’s gifted with the spider’s sense and is “somewhat” trained to pick up on inconsistencies in people's stories. And if we were caught, the least that could’ve happened to us was that we wouldn’t be in each other’s arms anymore.

Depending on the exact circumstances of our situation, the greatest threat to our wishes was his Mom, or the fuzz. We never underestimated her Mom’s madness! As Reiner puts it, she can be an angel on her best days, or an evil witch on her worst days. I never wanted to see her in her most awful days again.

We knew this wasn't a game, and it was dangerous. We never did this before but somehow we had an idea of how quickly things could go bad. We went over all of our plans again, and again, and again… and made sure we had as many of the details thought out as possible.

We would everyday get our copies of BUY AND SELL Newspaper to scout for a small apartment, or a room for us to temporarily stay. We were ready to go where providence would bring us. As long as it was away from the scrutinizing people who were set to destroy us.

One morning, at 6:00 am, when he thought his Mom was sound asleep already, we daringly made our escape. With all my baggies, in a taxi, I went to his house in Pag-asa. My heart fast thumping, I threw small stones to his room’s windows, which luckily was facing the road. I had to be really careful, one false move and we could be dead meat! Reiner signaled me to be quiet from his window. Whew! At least he got the message I sent through the pebbles.

As surreptitiously as he could, he sneaked out his most essential belongings, including his car, Ecto 1. Reiner left his goodbye letter in his room, a letter that was well written to make the intended reader believe that he had no choice but to flee with the devil me. I knew for a fact that it was meant for the reader not to feel worse than the situation already was.

We drove 45 minutes going to Fairview. We didn’t have the slightest idea what this place was. We were totally strangers to the place. I heard from friends that Fairview was the haven of drug lords and drug pushers. But the last thing we needed at that moment of truth was a change of heart.

Reiner and I were like seamen in a lost ship sailing nowhere in the vast ocean. We went overwhelmingly astray!

The only treasure in our possession was our burning love for each other. Both of us were so sure that we were both dedicated to our relationship. We understood fully the dangers that we were both about to be exposed to and that we were both completely willing to take these risks to enable our relationship to go forward.

He would always tell me, “If only Pop’s well, he would be helping us, we wouldn’t have to go through all these hardships.” His father was a very brilliant lawyer during his best days. He was a good provider and a good friend to his sons, as told by Reiner. Unlucky me, I met his Pop already a stroke patient.

He told me that even if we were struggling that bad, he was more than 100% happier now than when he was in Pag-asa.

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